What do I know?

The march of life has been on my mind a great deal lately.

In my youth, I was in a hurry.  I was in a hurry to be an adult, in a hurry to be self-sufficient, and in a hurry to get my life on a path.  I believed that once I had set my course, found a career, and started my family that life would be in order.  But a strange thing happened.  As soon as I answered questions about who I would marry, what I was going to be when I grew up, and the general direction of my life, new questioned emerged.  Where would we live?  How we would pay the bills?  How would I advance in my career?   Once those questions were answered, another level of even more difficult questions emerged.  How do I raise my children to make the most of their natural gifts and talents?  How do we teach them about who God is and lead them into a relationship with Him?  How do I keep my career in balance without missing my children’s childhood and still performing well at the office?  How much is too much and what is the cost?  And so it goes.

The ministry has given us the great privilege to make friends with people from many different stages of life.  Without these experiences, I would have believed that people in their retirement years would be finished with the questions.  Retirement is the pinnacle.  They receive an income with no work responsibilities, their home is likely paid for, their kids are grown, and life should be freedom and bliss.  But now I see these issues emerge in the lives of so many retirees:

• Coping with the physical separation from children and grandchildren
• Adjusting to a culture than is radically different than the one they grew up in
• Personal illness or the illness of a spouse
• Death of childhood friends
• Troubled children or grandchildren
• Learning to deal with grief and loss as a way of life

There is a song by Sara Groves that captures the struggle so well.   It’s called “What Do I Know” and you can listen to it here.  The song chronicles Sara’s conversation with an 88 year-old friend.

What Do I Know, Sara Groves

I have a friend who just turned eighty-eight
and she just shared with me that she’s afraid of dying.
I sit here years from her experience
and try to bring her comfort.
I try to bring her comfort
But what do I know? What do I know?
She grew up singing about the glory land,
and she would testify how Jesus changed her life.
It was easy to have faith when she was 34,
but now her friends are dying, and death is at her door.
And what do I know? What do I know?

Well,I don’t know that there are harps in heaven,
Or the process for earning your wings.
I don’t know of bright lights at the ends of tunnels,
Or any of these things.

She lost her husband after 60 years,
and as he slipped away she still had things to say.
Death can be so inconvenient.
You try to live and love. It comes and interrupts.
And what do I know? What do I know?

Well,I don’t know that there are harps in heaven,
Or the process for earning your wings.
And I don’t know of bright lights at the ends of tunnels,
Or any of these things.

But I know to be absent from this body is to be present with the Lord,
and from what I know of him, that must be pretty good.
Oh, I know to be absent from this body is to be present with the Lord,
and from what I know of him, that must be very good.

So what’s the point of these heavy observations?  The point is that we cannot  rush through a phase of life because the elusive answer is just around the corner.  Each phase of life has its mix of good and bad.   For each unanswered question there are also great experiences and wonderful memories.  There’s the thrill of the first taste of adult freedom, the excitement of a new job and broadened horizons, the first cry of a newborn, the joy of a giggling toddler, the fun of athletics and activities, and much, much more.

This all reminds me of what Jesus tells us in Matthew:

Matthew 6:19-21

Do not store up for yourselves treasures on earth, where moth and rust destroy, and where thieves break in and steal. But store up for yourselves treasures in heaven, where moth and rust do not destroy, and where thieves do not break in and steal. For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also.

v.  34

Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own.  (NIV)

And again, Solomon’s conclusions in Ecclesiastes:

Ecclesiastes 12:13

Fear God and keep his commandments, for this is the whole duty of man.  (ESV)

It sounds trite, but life really is a journey;  worry is wasted energy;  time doesn’t unwind;  and, once a phase is gone, it does not come back.  Slow down and enjoy life right where you are.

Thought Questions

1. Have there been particular phases in your life that you rushed through because you thought the next one would be better?  What do you miss from that phase of life?
2. What can you do today to start enjoying life more right where you are?

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