The ad troubled me. I couldn’t help but wonder what “getting the church back to what it used to be in this country” meant.

Here are some of the descriptions that came to my mind:

• I thought of hard wooden church pews and funeral home fans.
• I thought of piano music and well-worn hymnals.
• I thought of a cultural Christianity where the label Christian was synonymous with “good moral person,” not sold out follower of Christ.
• I thought of churches more committed to tradition, facilities, history, and denominational loyalty than the call of Christ for today.
• I thought of a group of believers complacent from living in a culture where Christian = good moral person.
• I thought of an organization more committed to the democratic process than the leadership of Christ.
• I thought of Laodicea.

Perhaps you think I’m a bit harsh. I will acknowledge that for all of her faults and blemishes, this church of the past has served me well. I have been taught by faithful children’s pastors, Sunday School teachers, youth leaders, and senior pastors. I am the beneficiary of a lifetime of church attendance, of teaching, and of serving. The church of the past was not ALL bad.   The danger, however, is in thinking that she was ALL good.

As a committed follower of Christ be certain that you don’t long too deeply for the past. You run the risk of making an idealized view of what-used-to-be your idol.

Remember, the state of our world today is the natural outworking of the decisions we made in the past. Let’s not wish for a repeat of that.

Here are some ways that I can tell when my life is out of balance:

1. My mood is ‘frustrated’: When life is out of balance, I’m frustrated with everything. Instead of gently responding to a child’s spilled drink, I will bark. A simple request by my boss will seem unreasonable. A question from my husband will be met with disdain. Continual frustration is a sure sign that a change is necessary.
2. I feel out of control: When life is out of balance, I feel like I’m no longer in control of my schedule. Mornings are met with dread, not expectation. Every moment seems filled with something I don’t want to do. Ministry work seems burdensome.  My job is more than I can take.  Family responsibilities seem oppressive.  If I feel like running away, I know it’s time for immediate intervention!
3. I am preoccupied with ME: When life is out of balance, I start to ignore other people’s needs. I become selfish with my time. I no longer want to let the kids have a friend over. I don’t want to have dinner with a friend. I want to say, “My time is MINE and you can’t have any!”

When I see these attitudes crop up consistently, I know it’s time to evaluate and make changes. The end result of a life out of balance is personal misery and broken relationships. Next week we’ll look at how to make adjustments to keep life in balance.

How do you know when your life is out of balance?

Earlier in the day, my husband heard a commotion while studying in the living room.   He quickly went outside and  put a stop to the most exciting ride since the Tornado at Six Flags.

He barked, “You’re grounded!” and immediately sent the neighbor children home.

Once inside, he asked our daughter to stand on the bed; he looked her in the eye. With a stern voice he asked her what she was thinking. Her face dropped as she looked at her feet. Without warning, a smile transformed his face, and he said, “Good job! I love it!”  He continued,  ”You’re not grounded. I just didn’t want the neighbor kids thinking it was OK for them to do that.” She beamed!  Her small frame bounced up and down, and she high-fived her daddy. He said again, “Good job!”

I stopped and wondered how her mother would have reacted upon discovering her adventure?

I would have made her stop.

I would have sent the neighbor children home.

But then…..

I would have warned her of the dangers of riding a plastic cooler down the concrete steps. I would have told her how I hate emergency rooms, and copays, and broken bones. I would have asked what on earth made her think it was OK to ride a plastic cooler down the concrete steps right by the road! I would have made her cry.

I would have crushed her adventurous spirit and wounded her tender heart.

When the house was quiet and the kids were in bed, my husband and I shared a laugh about the day’s events. I silently thanked God that my kids have one parent who will encourage their sense of adventure. I also asked him to have mercy and limit our emergency room visits.

The fourth small-community obstacle is a segmentation of the mission of God. The mission of small communities is not to teach the Bible only. Every expression of the church owns all the mission of God. Your smaller community owns the mission of God. You have been called and empowered. The danger of segmentation is great. The smaller communities say that is not their role. Our purpose is to get through the study, they think. (p 191)

Don’t miss this:  Every expression of the church owns all the mission of God. This includes my small group!

I realized when reading this chapter, that my experience attending small groups has been terrible, especially in adulthood.  With one wonderful exception, the small group was where a lesson was taught before real church got started.  All of the following behaviors have happened in small groups I’ve attended in the past:

• Women have competed for who can bring the best breakfast
• The wife of the small group leader declared,  “I hate the Old Testament”
• Senior adult ladies complained about the arrangement of furniture in the sanctuary
• Prayer time has turned into gossip hour

My terrible experience attending small groups has led to a misunderstanding of the purpose of a small group.  As a leader, I’ve tried hard not to repeat the bad behaviors I’ve seen in the past, however I’ve missed the mark in guiding my group to own the full mission of God.

It’s the time of year for small group restructuring in our church.  As we make changes, I’m going to develop a plan to better lead my small group to express the full mission of God.  This includes deeper personal spiritual growth for each of my group members, but expands to having a mission in our community.  I must lead our group to engage people far from God and foster times of genuine fellowship with one another.

What have you done or experienced in your small group that has contributed to expressing the “full mission of God?”

• I can do it. I can’t do everything.  My time is my most valuable asset and my commitment to God can be gauged my how I spend my time.
• A full schedule indicates a full life. A schedule that is too full hinders the movement of God in my life.  I have become so protective of my time I don’t spend as much on people in spontaneous situations where God works.



• There will be time in the future to do x. If there is something important to me, I need to prioritize it, put it on a list, and get it done.
• Owning property is a way to personal security. My security is in Christ, not my things.

These are just a few things on my mind lately.  What about you?  Are there any ideas that you’re giving up?

1. Never use Church Words without defining them: If you’re like me, church is such a part of your life that words like Sunday School, Youth Group, Vacation Bible School (VBS) basic to your vocabulary. When you are incorporating a new person into ministry work, be sure define your terms. Many misunderstandings can be stopped before they start!
2. Never throw a volunteer into a ministry opportunity without knowing their gifts and preferences for ministry: While we don’t always have ministry work available for everyone to perfectly match their desires, it’s important to know what the individual’s perceived gifts and talents are. It’s OK, and often recommended, to ask a volunteer to step outside of their comfort zone, but it’s important to KNOW their preferences and gifts so you can provide the proper training, support and encouragement. You may find a talent that will make your ministry more effective!
3. Never allow a volunteer to over-commit: When a new person gets involved in your church and is excited to serve, it’s easy to say ‘Yes’ when they want to get involved … everywhere! Before you know it, the new person is teaching Sunday School, volunteering in the nursery, going out visiting with church members one night a week, and helping with the children’s ministry another night during the week.While it’s important to cultivate their enthusiasm, it’s also important to teach a healthy understanding of ministry and life balance. My general rule is that EVERYONE should have one regular church service or class that they attend as a participant, not a worker. If an enthusiastic volunteer overcommits, they will quickly burn out. I have seen people leave a church because they overcommitted and then felt guilty that they couldn’t keep up with all of their ‘responsibilities’.
4. Never assume new ministry workers understand the purpose of the ministry: Be sure that you communicate clearly to a new ministry worker the purpose of the ministry they are being asked to participate in. Is the ministry focused on discipleship, recreation, providing for physical needs, all of the above? If you can’t clearly articulate the purpose of the ministry, the worker will have a very difficult time finding their unique role. For example, don’t say, “Our church has always had a young adults Sunday School class teacher and assistant.” Instead say, “The purpose of our young adult Sunday School class is to help recent high school graduates navigate the life challenges they face as adults and to teach them to live out the gospel in practical ways.”
5. Never pretend like you have all the answers: Starting to help in ministry can be overwhelming, especially when the ministry leader looks like they have it all together. When leading a ministry effort, you want to have a plan, perform with excellence and see people grow in their relationship with and knowledge of God. But by appearing to have it all together, newcomers often struggle with where they fit in the ministry. Be honest with newcomers about challenges you face, with new things you’d like to do, and with areas where improvement is needed. When you are honest about areas that need improvement, the newcomer may be able to see an immediate area where they can help. At the very least, they’ll see your vulnerability and desire for continued improvement and growth!

Leading a church ministry is challenging. Avoiding these common mistakes can help you have a more effective ministry and can help you disciple your volunteers.

I seek at the beginning to get my heart into such a state that it has no will of its own in regard to a given matter. Nine-tenths of the trouble with people generally is just here. Nine-tenths of the difficulties are over come when our hearts are ready to do the Lord’s will, whatever it may be. When one is truly in this state, it is usually but a little way to the knowledge of what His will is.

This statement has been like a hot coal burning in my mind. It has made me realize how many of my prayers are centered on what I want to happen, and not what God wants. I have been trying to “get my heart into such a state that is has no will of it’s own” and it is HARD.

Muller says my goal in prayer should be to jettison what I think is best, what I want, what would be most comfortable for me, and to approach God with a blank slate. I have made it my personal challenge to pray this way about one particular area of my life. Did I say it was hard? It’s been nearly impossible.

Until now, I’ve been blissfully unaware of how much I pray using the phrases “I want,” “I think,” “I need.” Suddenly, I am aware of how much my own motives impact my prayers. When I take the “I” out of my prayers, I don’t know how to pray. The most shocking revelation is that for years, I thought I was praying deeply, intensely, and powerfully.

I’m not saying that the last 8 years of ministry have been for naught. God has done amazing things. I’ve seen babies healed, addicts set free, new life begun, old habits left behind, needs provided, and the Kingdom advanced. God has blessed us beyond measure. But I’ve known somewhere deep inside, that God wanted more … more of me.

Imagine discovering one day that the face you’ve seen in the mirror all of your life really isn’t your face. That is how I feel. It is as if the mirror has been a grand illusion. Instead of having fair skin, red hair, and freckles, it’s as if I really look like the Wicked Witch of the West. I have believed myself to be faithful in prayer, seeking God selflessly and intently. Now I see that I’ve been motivated, at least in part, by my own selfishness. Self-awareness is a scary thing (at least when you’re me).

Praise God that he continues to be patient and merciful. Today, I’m asking him to make his will clear in a particular situation. I’m asking him to help me see the Wicked Witch of the West more clearly. Not so that I will think more meanly of myself, but so that I will really know how much better his ways are than mine. And maybe very soon, I’ll be able to say I’ve gotten my heart into a state where it has no will of its own.

However, as we explore these particular chapters, we’ll find that there is a lot of truth here left unexplored. We’re going to join the Israelites about 3 months after they’ve crossed the Red Sea and end with them only a few months later. I’ve been excited to see the fresh insight that I have gained from reading and studying these passages. I hope you will join me.

Reading for Today’s Study: Exodus Chapter 19

Let’s begin by reading Exodus chapter 19.

Key Verse: Exodus 19:4-6

You yourselves have seen what I did to Egypt, and how I carried you on eagles’ wings and brought you to myself. Now if you obey me fully and keep my covenant, then out of all nations you will be my treasured possession. Although the whole earth is mine, you will be for me a kingdom of priests and a holy nation.

The children of Israel have been set free from Egypt. They have seen God’s deliverance in a great and powerful way. God has set them free from slavery and delivered them by an unexplainable act of nature culminating in the death of every first born in Egypt and the parting of the Red Sea. Sweet victory! They are free from their captors and heading to a wonderful new home that God has promised. What an exciting time! God is so awesome! Looking back, we can see His plan unfold.

In the 3 months since they walked through the Red Sea on dry land, God had provided food from heaven, water from a rock, and victory in battle when they were attacked by a neighboring tribe. They were traveling through the desert to get to the land God had promised and He provided for their every need. But if we look closer, we can see trouble brewing in the minds and hearts of God’s people. In Exodus 16:3, the people said to Moses,

“If only we had died by the LORD’s hand in Egypt! There we sat around and ate all the food we wanted, but you have brought us out into this desert to starve this entire assembly to death.”

Have you ever felt this way? Have you ever believed that at one moment God was up to something in your life, then the next moment felt like he was gone? I have. Why is it that when we are in the middle of God’s working in our lives, we cannot see it? We look at the nation of Israel and ask, “How could they miss it?” But we also so often miss the working of God in our lives. We forget that one of God’s aims is to reveal his glory in and through us (2 Corinthians 3:18). Do we trust him enough to believe that what is happening right now in our lives can be used for his glory? Do we believe that he is ultimately in control, and that someone could one day look back on our lives and say, “Isn’t it amazing what God did?”

What prevents this from happening? Let’s take a look at what went on in the hearts of the Israelites that led to so many of their troubles.

We join the Israelites 3 months into their trek. They have entered the desert of Sinai and God has summoned Moses up the mountain. The message of God is simple. Read the key verse for today, again (Exodus 19:4-6). Look at God’s message closely. He said that they would be his treasured possession, a kingdom of priests, a holy nation. What an astonishing promise! He is telling this nomadic people that don’t even have a land to call their own that they will always be special to him. He, the creator of everything, believes they are special. He has a great purpose in mind for them.

So often, we see our own tendencies and behaviors mirrored in the Israelite people. You will notice that we, like the Hebrews, are quick to claim the promises of God, without claiming the conditions of God. God’s only requirement for this most special of all positions was obedience. He said only “if you will obey me fully and keep my commandments.” God’s message was, “I am the great Creator, I am the deliverer, I am the sustainer and provider of all that you are and have. Listen to me. Do as I say. Not because I desire control, but because I know what is best for my creation. Don’t touch the stove that is hot, don’t run out into the street. Avoid the temptations and pitfalls of life that bring pain and hurts. If you will just listen to me, do not turn away from me, and do what is best for you, I will make you a special and set apart people.”

What will the Israelites choose? Verse 8 gives us their answer:

The people all responded together, “We will do everything the Lord has said.” So Moses brought their answer back to the LORD.

God promised and the people responded, so far so good. Next week we will explore the people’s response. For now, spend some time thinking about the questions below and your response to them.

Thought Questions:

1. Have you ever felt like God was leading you somewhere? Why or why not?
2. What could the Israelite people have done to help them when they felt like God had abandoned them (Exodus 16:3)? How can we relate that to our experience when we feel like God has led us somewhere just to leave us abandoned and alone?
3. Can you think of a time when God was working and active in your life and you couldn’t see it until you looked back? Why couldn’t you see his action at the time?
4. What can you do today to be more aware of God’s working in and around you?
5. Do you feel like God’s message to the Israelites in verses 4-6 apply to you? Why or why not?

From Mere Christianity
By CS Lewis
Let’s play name that sin! Read the paragraph below and see if you can determine what vice CS Lewis is talking about?

The Great Sin

I now come to that part of Christian morals where they differ most sharply from all other morals. There is one vice of which no man in the world is free; which every one in the world loathes when he sees it in someone else; and of which hardly any people, except Christians, ever imagine that they are guilty themselves. I have heard people admit that they are bad-tempered, or that they cannot keep their heads about girls or drink, or even that they are cowards. I do not think I have ever heard anyone who was not a Christian accuse himself of this vice. And at the same time I have very seldom met anyone, who was not a Christian, who showed the slightest mercy to it in others. There is no fault which makes a man more unpopular, and no fault which we are more unconscious of in ourselves. And the more we have it ourselves, the more we dislike it in others. (From Mere Cristianity by C.S. Lewis)

1. What is your response to this paragraph?  Were you surprised when you found out what CS Lewis is talking about?
2. How can we recognize this vice in ourselves?
3. We are going to hear more from CS Lewis on this great vice.  What thoughts and ideas stand out to you?
4. Are you, as Lewis suggests, more likely to notice this vice in others than yourself?  Has there been a time in your life when you have been painfully aware of your own struggles in this area?
5. What do you think about CS Lewis’ recommended first step in this area?

You can read the entire chapter on The Great Sin, here.

Verses on the topic:

Proverbs 11:12

Proverbs 13:10

Proverbs 15:25

Proverbs 16:18-19

Proverbs 18:12

Proverbs 29:23

Luke 14:7-11

 In Luke 14, Jesus gives us a practical example of how to handle this vice in our lives.  Discuss his solution and how it would apply to you in your life today at home, school, church, and on the job?

Has there ever been an instrument of mankind that has caused more damage than the tongue?  Today we’re going to look at a selection of verses from Proverbs and see what they say to us about mastering the unwieldy tendancy our tongue.

Today, I hope this cross section of verses will help you see how serious this issue is and the consistency with which the book of Proverbs addresses this topic.  God takes mastering our speach very seriously, therefore so should we!

Truth and Lies

Proverbs 6:16-19
There are six things the LORD hates,
seven that are detestable to him:
haughty eyes,
a lying tongue,
hands that shed innocent blood,
a heart that devises wicked schemes,
feet that are quick to rush into evil,
a false witness who pours out lies
and a man who stirs up dissension among brothers.

Proverbs 21:6
A fortune made by a lying tongue
is a fleeting vapor and a deadly snare

Proverbs 16:13
Kings take pleasure in honest lips;
they value a man who speaks the truth.

1. From Proverbs 6:16-19, what three detestable things in these verses are related to our tongues and/or how we speak?
2. Why do you believe lying is addressed so seriously here?
3. What does Proverbs 16:13 say will happen if you consistently speak the truth?
4. Do you struggle with telling the truth, and what can you do to improve in this area?

Holding Our Tongue

Proverbs 10:19
When words are many, sin is not absent,
but he who holds his tongue is wise.

Proverbs 11:12
A man who lacks judgment derides his neighbor,
but a man of understanding holds his tongue.

Proverbs 17:28
Even a fool is thought wise if he keeps silent,
and discerning if he holds his tongue.

Proverbs 21:23
He who guards his mouth and his tongue
keeps himself from calamity.

Proverbs 4:24
Put away perversity from your mouth;
keep corrupt talk far from your lips.

Proverbs 15:28
The heart of the righteous weighs its answers,
but the mouth of the wicked gushes evil.

1. How should these verses impact how we speak and what we say to others?
2. Are you suprised at the number of times Proverbs references holding our tongue?
3. Is this an area of personal struggle for you? If so, why? What inner force makes you feel the desire to speak out rashly or thoughtlessly?

A Wise Tongue

Proverbs 12:18
Reckless words pierce like a sword,
but the tongue of the wise brings healing.

Proverbs 15:2
The tongue of the wise commends knowledge,
but the mouth of the fool gushes folly.

Proverbs 10:14
Wise men store up knowledge,
but the mouth of a fool invites ruin.

Proverbs 20:15
Gold there is, and rubies in abundance,
but lips that speak knowledge are a rare jewel.

1. Have you ever thought about how wisdom is linked to how and when you speak?
2. How can you move toward having the kind of wisdom spoken of here?

A Calm Tongue

Proverbs 25:15
Through patience a ruler can be persuaded,
and a gentle tongue can break a bone.

1. What kind of impact could this verse have in your family, church, and professional life if applied consistently?

Flattery and Boasting

Proverbs 28:23
He who rebukes a man will in the end gain more favor
than he who has a flattering tongue.

Proverbs 27:2
Let another praise you, and not your own mouth;
someone else, and not your own lips.

1. What do you think Proverbs 28:23 means by rebuke? How do you apply this verse lovingly be and consistent with all of scripture?
2. How do the instructions in this verse contradict what our culture recommends?
3. Do you have a desire to praise yourself and point out your accomplishments to those around you? Why do you think Proverbs 27:2 recommends against this?

Self Study

Look at the following links to keyword lookups at Bible Gateway. There are three searches: one for the word ‘tongue’; one for the word ‘mouth’; and one for the word ‘speak’. Read through the verses in Proverbs that reference our daily speach. Are there others trends that you see that were not discussed today? What topics stand out to you?

• Tongue
• Mouth
• Speak

Post a comment below about what you observed from this brief overview in Proverbs.